Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Is This Why I Drink Beer?

  • An = number of units of alcohol consumed
  • S = smokiness of the room (graded from 0-10, where 0 clear air; 10 extremely smoky)
  • L = luminance of 'person of interest' (candelas per square metre; typically 1 pitch black; 150 as seen in normal room lighting)
  • Vo = Snellen visual acuity (6/6 normal; 6/12 just meets driving standard)
  • d = distance from 'person of interest' (metres; 0.5 to 3 metres)

Scientists believe they have worked out a formula to calculate how "beer goggles" affect a drinker's vision. The drink-fuelled phenomenon is said to transform supposedly "ugly" people into beauties - until the morning after.

Researchers at Manchester University say while beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder, the amount of alcohol consumed is not the only factor. Additional factors include the level of light in the pub or club, the drinker's own eyesight and the room's smokiness. The distance between two people is also a factor.

They all add up to make the aesthetically-challenged more attractive, according to the formula.
The formula can work out a final score, ranging from less than one - where there is no beer goggle effect - to more than 100.

Nathan Efron, Professor of Clinical Optometry at the University of Manchester, said: "The beer goggles effect isn't solely dependent on how much alcohol a person consumes, there are other influencing factors at play too. "For example, someone with normal vision, who has consumed five pints of beer and views a person 1.5 metres away in a fairly smoky and poorly lit room, will score 55, which means they would suffer from a moderate beer goggle effect."

Some how I missed the opportunity to be a researcher on this study.


Eddie said...

Mark, you are a sad, sad man!

sandegaye said...

And I feel like the unfortunate Barbie doll that was pulled from the shelves for saying, 'Math is hard!'
Altho I recall Bushit saying the same thing about the war.. ugh.
'It's hard work!' riiiiiiiiight..

None said...

Mark - Too funny! Allow me to introduce you to one of our more popular country music tunes in the U.S. right now: "Billy's Got His Beer Goggles On" - Just go to http:launch.yahoo.com and select Videos by Genre - Country. I believe it's number 19. After you've watched it, you are ready to graduate up to "Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off."

Are we sophisticated over here or what? ha ha!

sandegaye said...

That's funny Jen! Having just moved to TN, I was surprised that the #1 hit here was was 'Rednecked Yacht Club', followed by, 'Jesus Loves You, But I Don't'.
We do have a long way's to go.. ha

Mark said...

Thanks all, I'll look up that track, Jen, when I get to a machine with sound, and I'll see if I can sample the Rednecked Yacht Club. I presume these are sailors who never turn their boats to the left!

Mind you, after reading the report, I felt there was some study missed out. I.e., does the formula still hold true if the man is drinking with his wife, girl-friend, partner etc, and does the quality of the beer have an effect. I think I'll write to the professor and suggest it, while offering my services to such an important study.

None said...

"Jesus Loves You But I Don't?" That reminds me of a story... My father-in-law was behind a car at a stoplight. The car had a bumper sticker: "Honk if you love Jesus." So, my father-in-law honked. The driver stared him down in the rear view mirror and gave him the finger. Nice... Sorry - I'm off topic now.

Yes, Mark - quality of beer most certainly should be factored in.